“Being Their Safe Place: Friendship, Mental Health, and Pride”

Blog by Makeda

Last year, I learned that being there for someone doesn’t always mean saying the right thing. Sometimes, it just means being a quiet, safe space. It’s not about having the perfect advice or being a “hero”, it’s about listening, being present, and holding space for someone when they need it most.

I’ve realised that I often carry around pre-prepared, generic advice, the kind you hear in movies or read online. But when it comes to real conversations, especially around mental health, speaking before listening can do more harm than good. People struggle in different ways. They carry different fears, traumas, and mental health struggles, and nobody wants to be talked when they’re already feeling unheard.

For my friend, Pride Month was a celebration but was also a challenge in way. The pressure, from social media and tv to be loud and unapologetic and carefree, contrasted their feelings of depression and struggles with self-worth and fear of being rejected. They didn’t feel ready to be loud and unapologetic and that’s okay. Pride should be about embracing where you are, not where others expect you to be.

Instead of jumping in with solutions or trying to fix everything, I’ve found that just sitting beside someone, quietly and without pressure, can be the most powerful thing you do. You don't need to make a speech, and shouldn't expect anything, just being present is very powerful. Being a good friend, not just in pride month but at any stage of their journey, isn't about doing it perfectly but doing it gently and sensitively.